MAY WE PROTECT EACH OTHER
So, I send 12 rakhis home this time too. Nah actually 1 more than usual. The extra one for my little, soon-to-turn 6 nephew. In a few paragraphs from here, I will address that addition.
For the clueless, Rakhis are strings (often decorated) tied on the forearms of brothers seeking or thanking them for the protection they provide to our beings. Us, here, meaning us girls/women as sisters. In some cultures in India, it is also tied to fathers and uncles.
The 12 rakhis (minus 1), I send, are for my own older brother and cousins and family friends.
Yes I send them every year, mostly without fail. And I wonder every year why I do it. I would love to believe I am my own protector, the only person on whose arms I should tie the string is myself (like the latest Ford Ecosport advert). But I still sent, and probably will continue sending.
This time, though, while posting them, I found my answer and here I raise another question. Let me talk about the answer first, that one being more important. I usually send them rakhis because they like it, they feel loved and respected, and may be important, and are reminded of their "duty" towards me.
Now, my 6-year-old, little one. Dennis, I will address all of its through you. I don't need a special day to express this to you, but I will take the opportunity.
Please know: I can protect you, if you need; I will protect you, if you need. At your 6 and when your 60!
I stress on the "need" and mention the "can" and "will" because many times you may doubt I can and that I will. Because, your aunt is a Woman. She has been "seeking" your dad's protection for ever, so for you to doubt her capabilities, mental and physical, is but natural. But, please know, when she sends those raksha bandhans, she is making a statement too. She is promising her brothers of her constant support and "protection". I know of many friends who do extend those gestures, whether they get it in return or not. Financially, materially, emotionally. They will bring the world down to ensure their loved ones are safe and protected.
So its not your job alone.
A question to you now, or when you begin understanding what this piece is all about: Will you in turn, some day, tie one on mine or on Mom's and Grand-ma's may be? Even if you begin questioning the idea of Rakhi or Raksha Bandhan, in some point in time, I will be happy if you do. My brothers may or may not, but will you?
It will make happy, for once at least, to be recognised as an equal. The one who shares responsibilities of "protection" and support, besides other things, in her own home.
Will you then do something to make me happy?
I smile.
LOVE
-- Rosemary Marandi
4 comments:
Rose, in my family , they have always told me that Rakhis are love and protective bands for your brothers.. i.e. a girl ties the band around the brother's wrist to ward him from evils and for his protection.
my problem with it the one-sidedness.
Hmm thought provoking... I agree with your claim on mutual protection. When you tie a Rakhi on the wrist of your brother, you pray for his well-being and long life, you seek 'divine' protection for him. He, in his turn, promises 'human' protection. So whose protection do you think is more assuring?
I read up a bit on the history of Raksha Bandhan... there were several associated stories. In one of the stories, Indrani, Lord Indra's wife, ties a Rakhi on Indra's wrist to protect him from the demons. That's very different from what we celebrate today. Another story narrates, in the wake of the partition of Bengal, Rabindranath Tagore advocated the exchange of Rakhis to invoke fraternal feelings between Hindus and Muslims. Again, quite a different celebration. The underlying message though, in all cases, is that of love and protection. How about you defining what you want to celebrate this Raksha Bandhan?
As for Dennis, he, I believe, will grow up to be a wonderful, forward-thinking young man, knowing too well how strong and capable his aunt is, and understanding that muscle-power is not directly proportionate to ones power to protect. With or without a Rakhi, he will acknowledge women as equals.
Much love to Dennis and his aunt xx
Thanks Yours Truly (:P) I thought you skipped reading this one.
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